10 words to describe a 30-something me!

So, the prompt today asked me to describe myself in 10 words.

Tough task that is!

A long time back I had written this blog post – THIS IS ME.

Of course, over the years it has seen a few iterations and over the last couple of years plenty more, though they haven’t been updated on that post. But most of the stuff in that post, still holds true, even if it does come across as narcissistic, bordering on false perfection.

Describing myself in 10 words is by far one of the hardest posts I have ever had to write.

The below are the top 10 words that would describe me NOW at this point of time.

Dancer. Reader. Closet Writer. Pragmatist. Stubborn. Travel-holic. Trivia Addict. Pluviophile. Materialistic. INTROVERT.

The top 4 are the ones that I identify with the most. The first 3 have now become my individuality.

The 5^th one, I’d rather prefer what Amma says about me. She says I have a lot of will-power when I need to get something done, but of course, that something has to be something that I need / want / desire / must-have. And I always disagreed with her until recent times, when I see myself doing things that I really really want and seeing the stubbornness reflected.

The 6^th one is a recent addition, thanks to the privilege of being in a place that has access to visit most of the South-East Asian countries, at a reasonable price. And I hope it increases in fervour as the years pass by.

The 7^th is as a result of my something a good friend of mine told me in MBA. Of course, me being me, took it a little too harshly, but once I started doing those random readings, web-hopping, it caught on like wild-fire. Suffice to say, I thrive on trivia these days.

The 8th I have expounded on enough here. :-)

The 9th of course is something that is inherent in me. I hate change. I like my things how they are, and how they have been for years. Force of habit you could say, and in that sense alone, I am extremely materialistic when it comes to my comfort zone.  I like comfort, I like security and I definitely need to know where the next paycheck is coming from to keep my creature comforts.

The 10^th is something I realized when I reached my wise old years – the 30s. :) It was brought on by a conversation I had with a very good friend. We were discussing mutual friends and who was an introvert and who was an extrovert. Up until that point, I was under the impression that I was an AMBIVERT. You know, it sounded cool so to say and being an introvert is almost always looked upon in a negative connotation. This is now changing thanks to social media. So all along, while my heart knew that I was an introvert and that I regained my energies in solitude, my ego never let me admit it. And when he told me that I was an introvert, for a long time, I tried to defend it. But like I said, in my previous post, acceptance is the first step to everything. When I accepted, and embraced the fact that I was actually an introvert, it didn’t really seem so bad, you know. So, what?  We have our good qualities and our moments, except that most happen in solitude or with a very small group of people. Quality over quantity you see! ;)

So that’s me in a nutshell, as of now, for you ;)

And for some reason, I hope these qualities of mine never change. And that I will keep adding more as the years go by.

One can, of course, always hope can’t they ;) 

Ramblings of a recent pluviophile.

Some days you get up with a glorious sense of purpose, filled with positivity and an urge to complete all the pending tasks, take on new ones and have a productive, energized day where at the end of it you feel satisfied with the accomplishments of said day and a sense of fulfilment.

Today is NOT one of those days for me. I have them on and off, but not today.

Today is one of those days, where I want the dull overcast skies to open up and browbeat us into submission, into taking shelter and watching the rains pelt down.

Today is one of those days where I want to laze about my cosy flat, sipping endless cups of masala chai, observing the clouds pass by, munching on potato chips and surrendering myself to binge-watching F.R.I.E.N.D.S.

You, of course can see where I am going with this right!

I miss the rains. I am not a true blue pluviophile. Rather I am a recent convert.

For the longest time ever I hated the rains. Hate is a very strong word though; I just didn’t like them rains. And being from a place that worships and heralds the showers, I didn’t quite understand the whole fuss about it except that the crops and the running water depended on it.  To me, the rains were symbolic of early morning cuddling inside the bedsheet, not wanting to go to school, uniforms that never dried and the slush and mud that soaked through the shoes and socks. School always reopened after the summer vacation at the outbreak of the monsoons and it was simply uncanny how it always used to end up raining exactly around the time we had to leave for school.

But off late, I crave for these bursts. Being in a place where rains are more like ‘switch-on-switch-off’ phenomenon, I miss the monsoons back home dreadfully. In fact, my whirlwind trip this time home had a specific wish attached to it. R.A.I.N.S. And I got my wish and quite a lot of it too. :)

(C) Aishwarya Ananth

I think there is a deep bond that is attached to it, that I have discovered recently.

The smell of the earth, the feel of those first few beads hitting you squarely, the first blast of the chillness that knocks into you, the puddles, the splashes, the leaves tinged with the dewy droplets, the feet that get wet soaked through the sandals that you wear, the sense of calmness that pervades you, the beating heart that settles into the rhythm of the pitter-patters on the rooftop, the nostalgia that engulfs you, the feeling of freshness, new starts and that of washing away vestiges of despair and ire. …. I can go on and on… and of course curling up with a hot tea, a book and enjoying the rains never really hurt anyone, did it? ;) :)

(c) Aishwarya Ananth 

I understand that feeling now. The fuss that people back home make about the rainstorms. There really is no comparison, is there? I have seen and felt the rains at plenty of places. But nothing really compares to the feeling that you get when you enjoy it back at the hometown – the place that you are born and raised.

And that my dear friends, is a feeling akin to nothing else. 

A walk in the rain...

I like rains.

Not the heavy downpours. Oh well! Them too sometimes! But only when I am in my cozy room with a hot mug of tea by my side watching the rains pelt down!!

But mostly I love the light drizzles. Especially at night. When you can see them twinkling under the light of the lamp posts. When you can walk under them and not really get soaked to the skin, but get just a little wet, like you have been through one of those rapids or those fun rides at an amusement park. The ones that leave you glistening like you just had some dew drops fall on you. Those ones.

They are magical. They are captivating.

They make me feel special. Alive almost. When they hit me, I like to hold my face up to the sky and have them fall on my face, each one rolling off like they belong there but then again like they don’t. Reminiscent of how invariably they leave their mark even if they have rolled off. A streak of the water droplets running through my face. And not in the form of tears. Now if that’s not bliss, I don’t know what is!

My Christmas – 2012 was like this.

Faint drizzles, a solitary avenue, flashes of rain shimmering under the yellow light of the lamp posts, melodious music from the phone I carry with me always and a slow, silent, introspective walk. It was beautiful. It filled me with a sense of calm. A sense of peace after a long time.

A week after that was New Year’s. Readers of this space will know how much I have been looking forward to 2013.

These things are significant to me. Festive Days, New Year’s, Birthdays, Key dates, Milestones… they are important to me.  To me, they mark a new beginning. A fresh start. At any time during the year. It’s my way of seeing that things can start afresh however bad they have been so far.

New Year’s was close to perfect as well. It drizzled again. I held my face up to the sky.

It’s definitely a new beginning.