Tuesday, March 15, 2016

When the mind goes a-wandering…

Sometimes I miss home. Mostly those days when I am feeling a bit under the weather and sick. But those are the times that I crave for Amma’s cuddle or Appa’s fretfulness at what might just be a headache.

Days when I am bogged down at work, or I feel unbelievable amounts of stress for no particular reason, my mind starts wandering. I reminisce about Kalam. About old childhood memories.

Have I told you about Kalam?

It was this large family home where I and Achu spent the better part of our childhood.  The house is no longer standing; we razed it down as it was getting difficult to maintain it, what with the termites and other small reptiles making it their home. But it was such a beautiful sprawling house. I make it a point to visit it every time I am at Palghat. A walk through the winding trails, through the bushes, an almost dry canal, into the rubber trees, and back to the base finishing off with an elaneer or two, is a standing practice these days. I have very fond memories of the place.


Appa’s Rajdoot bike parked in a corner.  Sargent our dog, who used to  make himself comfortable beside the bike.  Achu wearing my blue frock and coming down the stairs at Kalam.  Amma chasing us all around the house with books in one hand, trying to make us sit and study.  Ammamma holding a long stick in her hands, trying to hunt down the snake that appeared in the store-room amidst the dry coconut husks.  Sahadevan’s auto.  The Chembaka tree in front and the smell of the flowers. The Krishna idol that stands tall and the bench where Thatha used to sit.  The parrot cage hanging in front of the pillars outside with the cawing of the bird and me trying to teach the bird to sing / talk / repeat after me. Skinned knees from the trips down to the ‘parakulam’.  Amma wrapping me and Achu in one big towel after our baths.  The huge Aatukattil in the hall.  The cool floors inside where Thatha used to lie down in the afternoons and let us kids climb all over him.  The office rooms at the end of each side where chithappa and thatha sat doing their work.  The bell that Thatha jangled when he did the poojai.  The old bathrooms with their creaky taps.  The naripaarai where foxes used to come at night.  The attic where one had to crawl up a flight of stairs, almost like transporting us into a fabled other world.  The bats that used to be seen in the attic sometimes.  The granary inside the house where they used to store rice and other items.  The thair-kadayal that happened religiously every day.  The vadaams and koozhumaavu that Ammamma dried on the terrace.  The rubber sheets and the smokehouse.  The cowshed and the cows that grazed around.  The chakkai’s during the season. And the mambazhams. The elaneer that Sahadevan prised off the coconut trees. The bilvam leaves. The odds and ends, nooks and crannies, the water tanks. The rubber trees. The canal that ran by the side of it. The ball badminton ground. The Vishnu temple.

You know how they say; you never know value of what you have until you lose it?

Kalam for me is an example of that. Sometimes I wish the place was still there or that we had kept it and maintained it for what it was worth. 

I wish I was there now.

At Kalam. Or at least what’s left of it.  

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Translations
elaneer - tender coconut juice, chembaka - champak tree, aatukattil - traditional swinging bed, naripaarai - fox hillock (literal translation), thayir-kadayal - churning of the milk to get curd, chakkai - jackfruit, mambazham- mangoes, paarakulam - rock pond. 

Friday, February 12, 2016

Of Simpler times. Simpler Lives.

She stepped out of the hotel and looked up at the sky. A clear cloudless day. The sun was streaming down unflinchingly on the tourists. Big floppy hats, oversized sunglasses and tubes of sunscreen were all she could see on most of the tourists around. This was actually the best time of the year to visit Thailand, when the days were sultry and the nights were cool. It sometimes rained in the evenings but overall there was a pleasant breeze that was present all throughout. Today however, was a different story. She took measured steps towards the gully-like road towards the beach. A few more yards and she would lose the hotel Wi-Fi connection. She sent off a message to her folks, then looked around, ignoring the hawkers peddling their wares. And it was then that this caught her eye.


It instantly transported her to those days when she was a young brat, begging for rides in her great-aunt’s vintage fiat. The military green colour. The hardened seats. The window that you had to struggle with all your might to roll down. But all said and done, the car had that old-worldly charm. Her childhood was filled with many a ride in that car. Summer vacations back then were fun. Her entire brood of cousins would land up at her grandmother’s place and afternoons would be spent at her great-aunts’ place, lying down on the cool floors that were sprinkled with some water, listening to the stories that her aunt told about the golden days when they were kids and how simple life used to be back then. Pestering her aunt, while the latter went on her medical rounds, taking on some house visits, struggling all the while to keep quiet and not create a racket, as bored as she got, for she knew the rewards lay at the end of the ride. Sometimes, it was those orange candies or lemon candies, sometimes it was vanilla ice cream, and if she was really really good, she would be treated with one of those cassata bars. Simple life. Of no expectations and no worries. There was always someone to get her back and people to fall back on. The only biggest worry then was whether the skinned knee would hurt when she had a bath or if she would get the lion’s share of her grand mom’s famous fried potatoes. Simpler times. Simpler lives.

She felt the phone in her hand vibrate. Jolted out of the blue, she saw her dad’s message asking her to be safe and not to roam around after dark. She put the phone in her bag, and walked off to the beach. The sunset was just a few minutes away. It was one of the other things that soothed her mind. The nostalgia coupled with the homesickness brought on by the message heightened the urge to head back home.

She promised to herself. Soon. Soon.

Funny how random things could trigger off hidden memories and calm the mind.

Sometimes it was a stray word, sometimes the tune of a long-forgotten song, and sometimes a vintage car :)


Wednesday, February 10, 2016

When self-doubt hits!

I skipped the blogs for the last two days.

I had no specific reason. I am not going to give any excuses or apologize for that. I can vouch for the fact that I am no big writer neither am I so brilliant that people wait to read my blogs. At the most, I am average. Sometimes I write well, sometimes I don’t. So even when I started this blogathon, I had this niggling doubt in mind, that I was not really going to write to my satisfaction. And that doubt was reaffirmed when it was pointed out that I wasn’t doing any favours to my writing by doing something and writing something every day on the lines of “I don’t know what to post”  .. “I have no idea what to write” etc. The old me would have just taken those words to heart and would have just quit. I would have thought to myself, yes they are right! I am not doing this!!

But now, I want to write. I still want to finish this blogathon. I know those two days are going to hang over my head, but I still want to do this. Pig-headedness as some might call it. But I don’t want to quit this. I don’t want to let this go like how I let go of the other things that I started so easily. And every time these days when I get that doubt, there is other quote that comes to mind – “The worst thing you write is better than the best thing you didn’t write!!” – It’s what I posted on the first blog I wrote for the blogathon. That reaffirms me. :D

So today I will share with you something I wrote a long while back. During one of those dark phases. It is a very abstract piece. It’s something that I wrote in a span of a few moments a few years ago. Tidbits that I write, save and don't find the courage to publish! :) I don't really remember what made me write this, probably must be one of those black moods
Here goes…
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“There is a morbid pleasure that we as humans derive in subjecting ourselves to abject misery.
That feeling of martyrdom that elevates in ourselves a feeling of superiority.
The feeling that because we are so miserable; we are in a much loftier position than the rest of the world that is happily cocooned in their contented lives.
After all what do they know of what suffering we have undergone and how it has transformed us into what we are today as opposed to what we were before this so-called misery was thrust upon us. 
Who could say how we might have ended up had we not been through so much!
All of us are broken in that sort of way. Some take a long time to recoup. For some others it’s just a matter of time. And for sometimes very rarely, it is quick and painless when they meet the right person(s). That of course depends on whether you find the right person and you recognize them to be so.
Various moments. Various right kinds of people.
Right for then, at that point of time.
Wrong for other times.
Half the time I think what happens is that you make do with what you have and forget the quest for what you want.
And therein lies the difference.”

Sunday, February 7, 2016

On the eve of the Year of the Monkey!

Its day 7 of the month and the 2nd day of the long weekend.

Remember how excited I was about the long weekend coming up and 4 days of holidays and all that, now I am raring to get back to my work! Yes! The same conundrum! The fact that the grass is always greener on the other side.

The thing about staying in a place long enough (in my case – 6+ years) is that you have seen all that there is to be seen, done all that there is to be done and now there is nothing to do. And the other thing about staying in the world’s most expensive city is that the minute you step out of the house you end up spending at the very least 10$ … sometimes there is nothing called self-control. Case in point today evening, I stepped out in the evening with friends and ended up buying a pair of tan coloured pants of which I had no need!! My justification to self was that new clothes I can always end up using! :P Sigh! Yes! I know.

But like I was saying, the thing about staying in a place too long is that everything apart from regular or even impromptu shopping is ‘been there and done that’!! Oh, I can hear you saying that why did you go out of Singapore somewhere. This is just one of those times that none of the plans materialized. Next long weekend, wait and watch this space ;-) I have big plans!! But coming back to Singapore, especially on the eve of Chinese New Year, when everything is closed. 90% of the shops in the mall we went today to were shut! This was at 7 in the evening! And as far as going out and partying is concerned, I would rather end up settling in bed with a nice book and all snuggled up inside my quilt. The days of pulling a night-outer are well past. Oh the perils of growing old ;) :P

And now I have no idea how to end this post. Do I go on and on about how boring Singapore is on long weekends, or do I go on about how things change as soon as you hit the 30s. I think I just got an idea for my next blog post ;)

And as for this one, I think I will end it by wishing you all …..

A VERY HAPPY GONG XI FA CAI AND A HAPPY YEAR OF THE MONKEY! :)

Stay happy and stay blessed! :) :)

Saturday, February 6, 2016

Bangalore Naatkal - A review!!!

Today's blog post is a review of 'Bangalore Naatkal' - the remake of the acclaimed 'Bangalore Days'.

Straight up, let me tell you that I have seen Bangalore Days umpteen times. It was one of a kind movie in Malayalam and I regard it to be a classic. So huge huge fan right here. I think that the casting was perfect in that movie and I loved every little bit of it. Every single nuance and dialogue and scene.

When I heard about it being remade in Tamil, I wasn't really very enthused about the entire thing. Why take something already very good and try to make it better. But then I had seen Paapanasam, the remake of Drishyam and I was very impressed. So I thought OK.  This should be good as well.

Unfortunately for me,  and please don't think that I'm being biased here, this one is quite annoying. Quite a lot of things  were annoying.

1) Bobby Simha's wig. And why would they choose him to play Nivin Pauly.  Total miscast right there.

2) Arya's selfie stick. Very very annoying.

3) Lakshmi Rai or Raai however she writes it. The reason that Isha Talwar with Nivin Pauly worked was because of their earlier pairing in Thattathin Marayathu. There was a history there that the director utilised so well. This one is a total total failure. Plus she looks OLD.

4) Basically the only good thing about the movie was Parvathy who reprised her role as RJ  Sarah.

5) Prakash Raj was wasted in his role.

I think I have said enough. I now shudder to think what the state of Premam would be. I hear that Shruti Hassan is playing Malar. I don't think I am going to watch it.

Honestly why twist a tried and tested formula!!!

Now am planning to watch Bangalore Days again to get over this !!!

Friday, February 5, 2016

The weekend is here! What's your plan :)

So every time I get stuck for words, or I have a writer’s block, I end up changing my template. I find that it inspires me to post something on my blog, just to mark the fact that I have changed something on the blog.

Do you like this template?  I also added a small snowflake effect to the blog. Thank you Google! I fiddled about with the code for a while on another template until I didn’t know what I did because every time I visited my blog page, it took me to an entirely new website. I don’t know how I managed doing that. So out went that template. In came this one, simple and easy to use plus I like those circle whirly designs on top. :) It’s supposed to emulate Spring. I think I liked it right there. :)

It’s the long weekend here, celebrating Chinese New Year :) and right now a 4-day long holiday sounds like bliss to me. :) I’m listening to these songs on YouTube while typing this out. I have my favourite songs on loop and on the player currently is “Ethu Kari Raavilum” from the movie Bangalore Days. Speaking of which, the Tamil remake Bangalore Naatkal is out and I am waiting to watch it this weekend as well.

Malayalam movies have come such a long way. For a cinema that used to celebrate tragedy in movies in 80s and early 90s they have sure evolved and become one of the most sought after movie industry now. I think the younger generation is playing its part quite well.

Is this post becoming too random?  I think it’s the effect of a heavy duty dinner of Fried Rice and Gobi Manchurian -  the yummiest combo ever, along with a glass of buttermilk that I just had!! :) Are you going rumbly in the tummy now as well!! ;)

I think I will put my legs up now, maybe stream a classic Malayalam / Tamil movie… I have my tub of ice-cream ready! :)

A classic Friday eve!


What are you doing tonight? :) :)

Spill over from yesterday ...

So I didn’t do a post yesterday. I was held up with a few things and I didn't manage to find any time before the deadline and therefore I have decided to do two posts today. Yay!! I am purely imagining that you all are extremely happy to see two posts from me today! ;) 

And since it doesn’t make sense doing to heavy posts in a day, I have resorted to doing a tag and then I will do my regular post, you know, the usual heavy duty long post :P :P

But here goes for now! :)

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·         Are you named after anyone? 
­    My official name isn’t after anyone in the family, however my birth name (yes! We’re posh like that! We have two names) is after my grand mom.
·         When was the last time you cried? 
­    I think Dec ’15 if I am not wrong. I have this huge phobia against lizards, and my current place of stay is filled with them! And one day, i just got frustrated and ending up choking on my daily call with the parents.
·         Do you have kids? 
­    Nope.
·         If you were another person, would you be a friend of yourself? 
­    Of course yes! I am the best! But honestly, it would be a little difficult considering my mood swings and low scale of social interaction.
·         Do you use sarcasm a lot? 
­    Yes. It helps when the other person understands sarcasm though.
·         Will you ever bungee-jump?
­    Oh boy yes! Been there, done that!! Will do it again!!!
·         What’s your favourite cereal? 
­    I don’t like cereals.
·         What’s the first thing you notice about people? 
­    Their smile and if the smile reaches their eyes.
·         What is your eye colour? 
­    Dark Brown.
·         Scary movie or happy endings? 
­    Happy Endings. I do like scary movies, but it’s a different feeling when a movie ends on a happy note.
·         Favourite smells? 
­    Petrol, kerosene, fresh paint, smell of old and new books, mint!
·         Summer or winter? 
­    Summer.
·         Computer or television? 
­    Computer. I don’t watch TV all that much.
·         What’s the furthest you’ve ever been from home? 
­    Where I am right now. Sing Sing Singapore.
·         Do you have any special talents? 
­    I like to think I am a good dancer and an average writer.
·         Where were you born? 
­    Tamilnadu.
·         What are your hobbies? 
­    Reading. Dancing. Writing.
·         Do you have any pets? 
­    No. I had one and he passed away. I am planning on adopting a pup soon.
·         Favourite movie? 
­    Those are way too long to list here.
·         Do you have any siblings? 
­    Yes. One younger brother.
·         What do you want to be when you grow up? 
­   I don’t want to grow up. I really don’t. Quite the odd thing to say when you’re in your 30s huh!!

So that’s that. The post for yesterday. Yes, I know I took the easy way out. And did the tag instead of an actual post. I will try and post a proper post from now on.

Deal. Ok? Ok. 

Grahanam - A review!

It has been quite some time since I penned something on this blog, and even longer, since I wrote a movie review. But there is no good time ...